Living with relatives who follow man-made religions

[Director Michael]

My husband (who is not yet a Noahide) and I have 3 small children. He doesn't want them to miss out on xmas. We won't be celebrating it because of the religious tradition. We seem to be celebrating it more just for the kids.

Please note that for the previous questions in this sub-forum that asked about this, and the answers explained that some leniency is permitted, those were all talking about the case in which the customs and celebrations would be going on in another person's house that would be visited temporarily. Specifically, the concern was about the separate home of a relative whose feelings would be hurt if the Noahide would refuse to visit, or agree to visit but refuse to participate in some way. So those posts weren't talking about the case of a Noahide being asked by a spouse to accept those customs and celebrations in his/her own home.

So here are my questions. If we get a tree am I permitted to help decorate it? What about putting something at the top? I'm assuming an angel would be forbidden, but what about a star? What about other decorations?

If it is going to be decided to have a tree in the home to avoid hurt feelings, there should be a request/proposal that it would be observed only as a cultural tradition, and not as a religious symbol. But the decorations of angels, or a prominent star, are specifically items with direct religious symbolism in this context, and as such they should be avoided if possible.
Although the idea of tree decorations in general goes back to ancient pagan religions, an argument can be made that non-religious decorations have become a cultural tradition with no particular religious significance.

What about Santa Clause? They already know about Santa is it OK to let them believe in him?
Thank you in advance

It would be a disservice to the children, because in several ways, it denies them good opportunities for learning to respect their parents, which is critical as a universal moral and logical obligation:
a) Children can learn to respect the fact that their parents are telling them the truth (e.g. that the presents actually come from the parents, grandparents, etc.)
b) If the presents are being given as a reward for good behavior, the children should know that their behavior is being judged specifically by the parents, and they are answerable to the parents, according to the standards that the parents set.
c) Children should learn to do the good deed of expressing thanks and appreciation to the actual person who does something nice for them.