09-23-2011, 01:39 AM
Thanks. I am at a loss to realize I am a believer. Most religions don't really include women. I never married. Mostly because of family responsibilities, lack of a good offer and being a quiet person. I've retired from work because I have several handicapped family members and it was just too hard to work full-time and see about their needs. The extra time has allowed me to think too much and listen too much to people who constantly want to know what is wrong with me that I never married. I basically tell them what I think which is having Miss on my tombstone will not be the worse thing that ever happened to me in life. However you do walk away feeling like a tremendous failure. I realize that there is a shallowness if not a cruel streak in these people. On a personal level, I wonder were my priorities wrong in life. I know this sort of thinking in which you second guess your choices may not be that healthy. Most of the choices I had in life I had to do because that was what was before me. I think licentious actions can dull your senses from relating honestly with another person, you reach a point where you lose that ability to connect with another person. You can also get a bad disease and not be available if someone good comes into your life. I taught children who were illegitimate and the pain was very real for them.